Day #610, Weekend

March 18, 2018
I had this beer geek friend couple over on Friday night, tried the popular Sicilian resto not far from my place, followed by 3 bottles of red at home with a Korean movie Steel Rain.
We stayed up till 3am talking about food, places and everything that interests us.
I made Kimchi Stew to cure hangover the following morning. All of us enjoyed it.
And my Sunday so far? Sleeeeeeeep.
I stayed up till midnight with the book ‘The Devil’s Cup’ yesterday, and slept until now with 2 ups for piss.
That’s me on any day when I dont have any plan – sleeping.
That’s why I need work or whatever that makes me not to stay in bed all day, for a meaningful life.
I was a depressed zombie for a while before coming to UK 2 years ago – sleep till 3pm, get up and eat, watch TV till 3am or so, back to sleep.
Maybe I needed that time to heal myself from heartbreak, but I desperately wanted to get out that status, and Brexit help me to decide and act quickly.
Hell, I need to go back to bed in a few hours to get up for work tomorrow!

Day #604, Monday

March 12, 2018


Do I have blues? Not really.

I guess Monday Blues come to people who do not want to go back to work after a little rest on weekends for whatever the reason.

I love going to work, to be with my colleagues, to see to progress, to learn new stuff from everyone and the job around me.

Of course I like weekends and am excited on Fridays, but I wonder what I would do if my days are always weekends.

If I were a millionaire, maybe I would travel the world? Wouldn’t I feel lonely in time even though I would meet new people everywhere? I will never know unless I become millionaire for real.

Anyway, supposedly hard Monday is done, I am preparing myself for another Tuesday.

Day #602, The Last 30 Hours

March 10, 2018

Start with a little drink with some colleagues at Waterhouse.

Sleep over at my best work mate Anna’s.

Get up earlier than usual Saturdays for a Park Run, not to run myself but to take photos of Anna’s couple and walk around.

Trip to IKEA for Anna’s first ever visit to my favourite store in the world and guide her through, and of course buy some stuff that I didn’t plan.

Cook Jamie’s skinny Carbonara for three of us and enjoyed the evening at my place.

A long bath after they left.

What a nice 30 hours so far.

Day #590, Sun

February 26, 2018

The sun is amazing.

Whoever created human body, it’s amazing how it works and connected all over.

The sun makes you feel happy. That is probably how the chemistry works inside from the vitamin D that is created by the sunshine.

And yes, that’s probably why people in Australia are so friendly and nice. Because they have the sun most of the year!

Oh I miss it sooooooo much, but it’s too far away…

Day 587, One of Those Days

February 23, 2018

I guess it’s one of those days today.

The days I get moody for no reason.

On these days, everything looks negative, feel like complaining about everything, but still try to look normal with ppl around but it doesn’t really work in changing my mood and making me feel better.

I’m wondering what I might be doing at work in a year, or even in 3 months time. Will I still be in Sales? Or even, will I still be at this company? Will I ever climb the ladder? Will I ever have better career in the company?

I also wanna know if I will ever have a decent relationship with someone again. I’m sick of being alone. I like my mates and love hanging out with them, but I do want to have my other half to spend most of my time together rather than socialising with work mates.

I’m planning my holidays, which makes me feel excited, but at the same time it makes me realise how precious it was to travel with my beloved. Travelling solo makes you see things differently, experience wilder and meet more ppl, which are really fantastic, but I still need one person very close to me at all times. Am I too needy? Is that normal? Am I crazy? Mental? I don’t really know, but I don’t think it’s curable even if it’s a mental issue. I do not believe in psychological counselling.

Well, if I go mental and no longer perform my life normally, so be it. That must be it for me in this world as a normal being.

What I hate about myself right now, is that I will push myself to act normal with my friends at my place tomorrow no matter what. That could be bad for myself as I push myself too much, but I can’t help it. Fucking Korean education that tells you to stay strong no matter what. I ran away from Korea because of many reasons and it was one of them. I do not want to be seen as Korean any more, culturally I mean, but I still have certain parts that shows I am rooted in Korea. Shit.

Day #570, Relief

February 6, 2018

Today should be the day to remember.

It’s the official date of my divorce.

I have been wondering how I would feel today, but actually I don’t feel anything specific.

Yes I feel very much relieved, not because I am finally divorced or an official single woman, it’s totally because I don’t have to deal with this fxxxing French bureaucracy any more.

Coming to France costs a lot but it’s doable and I can use the time to catch up with friends, it’s just that I have been worried the lawyers or the judge wouldn’t turn up and cancel my appointment so that I have to come again.

It’s finally done, now I only have to wait for my lawyer’s paperwork. What a relief.

I hope this is my first and last divorce procedure in my entire life.

Day #560, Senses

January 27, 2018

A day like today makes me realise how our brain works and how much our senses are connected.

The grey sky, the humid chilly air, the sound of wind and the smell of wet nature send a strong signal to my brain to make my body scream for a comfort food that will surely soothe the mood through my satisfying palate.

The chosen food by my instinct today is Kimchi Stew with Pork Belly and Rice.

Day #559, Waiting for a New Plan

January 26, 2018

A month is nearly gone.

I am still waiting for a reply about my recent application for a new role in Marketing.

I talked to a recruiter earlier this week, and he said I was on the waiting list. That was not a No.

The interviewers of the position will have interviews with 5 candidates this week, and if they are not satisfied with them, they will see me for an interview.

The recruiter said this offer was very popular.

Yeah no wonder. I really want this job but I shouldn’t put my hopes too high. There are 5 ppl before me. Five.

I can’t wait to go back to work on Monday to check my email!

Day #548, People

January 15, 2018

I ve been enjoying my weekends with my friends-colleagues and weekdays in cooking for the last two weeks.

It’s amazing how many good people I met through this company.

It’s something I have never experienced when worked at other places throughout my entire career life.

My company gives a lot to the employees, but that’s not what keeps me here. It’s these people that I don’t want to leave.

I still have about 1800 colleagues to get to know, so I won’t leave soon I guess.